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Post by Kage2020 on Jun 18, 2004 9:07:23 GMT -5
First off, it's good to see that people are posting more standard representations (SRs) of worlds in the Anargo sector. Some comments on the "SR" thus far presented, other than a bit of spell/grammar checking (which we all need! )... Where's the rest of it? Remember that the 'mainworld' of a system is just that: the mainworld. As such, information on the rest of the system should be incorporated. Check out the Anargo Standard Representation for more information. My apologies for the 'discussion' in between the SR of Anargo Primus and the companion star, Anargo Secundus... There are also points where you miss out the modified UWP, which is useful to the long-term goals of the project but also to show how your extended SR is based upon the numbers themselves. Formatting... Just a minor quibble, but when you do a final version of this (your own edits?) then put spaces between paragraphs, etc. Emboldened objects also make it easier to read and separate on the page. Again, check the link above for one potential example. GovernmentThe world has a 'standard' approach to government, i.e. the Imperial Commander is the sole authority. Perhaps some extended information could be supplied here? It just looks a bit... brief... otherwise. ReligionWhile I understand what "Nothing special" might mean, do not the majority of worlds have either puritanical or acculturated forms of the Imperial Cult? If the standard Imperial Cult is represented, then perhaps a reason why...? Or, rather, why it doesn't have an acculturated form? Society and Law"...the lowest on the latter..." Do you mean 'ladder'? We must be careful with the use of terms 'discharged Guard' since we're not entirely sure whether the Guard do get to retire and, if they do, return to their homeworld. I'm not saying that this is wrong, but the thought is still there... Regardless, does the Governor really count as a class to him/herself, even with extended family? TechnologyFair enough. Remembering, of course, that proximity to a Forgeworld in no way determines local tech level. Why bother with expensive transportation systems when cheaper ones will do? A TL6 transportation system is still quite developed and sufficient for most needs... Well, other than transporting them into space on the scale that you're suggesting. (And that is a huge scale!) Trade and TitheAgain there is the worry to the reference - I'm sure it's my misreading - of "home" Guard units being stationed on a world. The technologies that you describe as being produced seem, for the most part, to be above the local tech level. (Incidentally, make sure that this is in TTL terms; see the thread in World Building.) This is fair enough, but also means that - for some reason - the people of Salinas have franchised this out to the adeptus mechanicus. So the question of why the adeptus mechanicus produces this technology on the world when the same can be done on Proteus...? The discussion of the relative tactics used by the Altarrans and Salinas regiments is more appropriate in the section detailing the military, not in the section on Tithes. PsychologyErm, perhaps some more information on this as well. Language and DialectObviously this needs something other than what appears to be CELS' own comment... Planetary Defence ForceThe information put in "Tithe" can basically be cut and paste here... HistoryFairy snuff... Does it interact with any of the other worlds at all? Just thought that I would try and be the first to make initial comments.
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Post by CELS on Jun 18, 2004 10:22:31 GMT -5
I'm very happy to see another SR for the Archaios subsector! Thanks for your contribution, Zidagar. When we've finished the worlds currently being worked on, we'll have seven whole worlds for this subsector, by the look of things. (Proteus, Archaios, Modestus, Sistina, Altarra, Salina and the ice world by High Inquisitor) That means this subsector is very close to completion, which is really, really wonderful. Now, my comments. First of all, I was slightly let down by the fact that the SR wasn't finished. I agree with Kage's comments that some parts are too short, and of course, some parts are all but empty. I shan't complain however. All I ask is that when you've finished the SR (psychology, religion, etc) you start a new thread called Salina, and we'll lock this old thread. This gives us the SR at the beginning of a thread, for easy access My comments; 1) World class. Industrial worlds (aka factory worlds) and mining worlds are very specialized. Industrial worlds are litterally covered with factories, and have very little in the way of agri-culture. Likewise, mining worlds are dedicated to mining almost exclusively, and have minimal industry and agri-culture. I suggest that you either make a choice of one or the other, or just call it a civilized world. 2) Tech-level. Could you explain why the tech level is so low? I know that the worlds of the Imperium have radically different tech levels, from feral worlds to advanced hive worlds, but with this world sounding so valuable, I don't understand why the Imperium hasn't contributed to upping the tech level. 3) Society and law. Sounds very, very similar to Nagoma, in the Dorvastor sub. This isn't neccessarily a bad thing, I just thought I'd make you aware of this. 4) Greek influence. Hoplites, phalanxes, deserts... I think I said this before, discussing Altarra, but Archaios has a very greek theme as well. It would seem like a good idea to make sense of three greek-influenced world by explaining it in the history of these worlds. 5) Trade and Tithes. I suggest that you make it very clear that you're writing about Imperial Guard regiments here, which are called Salinas Phalanxes, and not the local PDF. Furthermore, the Altarran and Salinas tactics seem to compliment eachother rather than being incompatible, as seen in the history section. I like the stuff about animosity between these elite regiments though! ;D 6) PDF. I'd like to read more about this. Equipment, training, etc. So... nice work! Looking forward to reading more!
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Post by Zidagar Dinoman on Jun 18, 2004 10:49:31 GMT -5
I've decided to take some serious time and really finalize both Altarra and Salinas. I really want them to be opposites in some areas but remakably similar in others. You can go ahead and lock both threads if you want, and I'll post the FULL standard representations (with all the planets) sometime next week. Just some of my thoughts on the traits of the two worlds:
Altarra: Garden world, tourist spot. Relatively new, state run economy and education system (basically communism), compulsatory military service, low population, rural/self sufficent/survivialist population, cottage industries, with light military forces. Think of the wild west/colonial America with some communism thrown in.
Salinas: Mining/Industrial world. Relatively old, free market/labor union type of economy, voluntary military service, high population, population very urban/street smart, highly developed mass production tech, with heavy military forces. More of the United States today
Both: Democratic (relatively), regiments considered "Eilte"
The Salinas Phalanxes and Altarran Rifles don't like each other because, later in the Salinas Civil War, Alpha Legion insurrectionists convinced several commanders from both worlds that the others had turned traitor. After the dust settled, the Altarran 1st regiment (Rangers) had been destroyed by the Salinas 17th Phalanx (the Nightstalkers). Of course, the enemy agents were discovered and the Nightstalkers were cleared of any wrong doing. But the Altarrans never forgave them, and in virtually every theatre and campaign since, Phalanx and Rifle units in join operation cause more trouble for each other than the enemy, furthuring the blood feud.
-Dinoman
Comments and suggestions?
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Post by Kage2020 on Jun 18, 2004 10:52:01 GMT -5
Erm, I've only seen two SR for Proteus, and then incomplete...
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Post by CELS on Jun 18, 2004 12:05:40 GMT -5
I've decided to take some serious time and really finalize both Altarra and Salinas. I really want them to be opposites in some areas but remakably similar in others. You can go ahead and lock both threads if you want, and I'll post the FULL standard representations (with all the planets) sometime next week. Sounds wonderful! There's already a garden world in the Anargo sector being planned, I believe. Two garden worlds in the same sector is a bit much, and it begs the question of how the Imperium can afford using them as tourists attractions instead of cultivating the lands or building up other industry? I suggest making it more of an agri-world, with tourism as an important income (but far from dominating the world), and some cotton industry. Colonial America with some communism? A lot of communism, if you ask me Sounds good. Blood feuds are fun! Just don't take it too far, or the Ordo Hereticus will raise eyebrows...
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Post by Zidagar Dinoman on Jun 19, 2004 5:29:49 GMT -5
Why not two seperate Garden worlds appealing to different types of travelers? The garden world in Meksum could be like Las Vegas, appealing to the rich and powerful who want to get away in style. Altarra could appeal to the more adventurous noble, someone who wants to go on a safari and hunt big game?
-Dinoman
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Post by zholud on Jun 20, 2004 1:29:58 GMT -5
One quick point. It is hard to say that the South was socialistic/communal. To a large extent it was more free market and democratic than the North. Starting from the point that the North industries and entrepreneurs introduced protective tariffs to increase own profits, the war was due to the desire of North not to loose the markets. The South, lead by Democratic party called for greater autonomy ( Confederacy anyone?). Thus if your Agriworld is based on autonomy-loving South, I don’t expect to see the central government there, central planning and the like. And BTW trade unions are not ‘free trade’ economy style either. South will raise again!
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Post by Zidagar Dinoman on Jul 10, 2004 9:07:38 GMT -5
I'm currently finding it difficult to write even the most basic coherent sentence, so trying to work on my planets is proving difficult. Instead I've decided to post my hand-drawn maps. -Dinoman
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Post by CELS on Jul 11, 2004 12:03:05 GMT -5
Hey Dinoman, I'm currently working on a post for the Anargo Chronicles, and my character is in a shrine maintained by a priest from Salina. Now, under Religion you wrote "Nothing special" So I started thinking about what would characterize the shrines on Salina. You describe Salina as having a great military force, and being a lot like the United States today. Now, I don't know America that well, except from the media and from my short visits to Florida, but I have the impression that Americans tend to speak of God even when they're going to war. "May God give us the strength to fight this evil communism" and "May God help us fight the terrorists" and like that sniper in Saving Private Ryan, who was actually praying to God when he made his kills. From this, I guess Salina should have a very war-like view on religion and especially on the Emperor himself. I'm thinking that their places of worship would be very connected to war and struggle, and there would be images of war, weapons, stuff like that. Do you agree with this, Dinoman? Of course, you might say that the entire Imperial Cult has a very war-like view, and that all shrines might have a very strong militaristic and destructive theme, but I'm not sure I would agree about that. To me, the Imperial Cult at its purest stresses the purity of Mankind, the position of their saviour, the Emperor, and the darkness that is the alien, the mutant and the heretic. War is an important part, but it's not really the core of the Imperial cult, as I see it. And there are probably a lot of accultured forms of the Imperial cult that have a less destructive theme. The Meksumians are known to be rather peaceful, for example, and I'll probably make some cultures on Archaios to be like that as well. Not pacifistic, but not entirely devoted to bloodshed either. But I digress. Do you agree on this militaristic and destructive theme for a Salinan shrine? PS: On the map, are you sure it's feasible to have a desert on that continent? I mean, not only is the temperature quite... well, temperate, but this world is so wet, it has so much water, that I don't understand how this land could remain dry. It has the right temperature for vegetation, and I imagine rain showers would be frequent.
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Post by Zidagar Dinoman on Jul 11, 2004 13:24:13 GMT -5
[glow=red,2,300] Warning: Potentially Inflammatory Political Statements Below[/glow] Hey Dinoman, I'm currently working on a post for the Anargo Chronicles, and my character is in a shrine maintained by a priest from Salina. Now, under Religion you wrote "Nothing special" So I started thinking about what would characterize the shrines on Salina. You describe Salina as having a great military force, and being a lot like the United States today. Now, I don't know America that well, except from the media and from my short visits to Florida, but I have the impression that Americans tend to speak of God even when they're going to war. "May God give us the strength to fight this evil communism" and "May God help us fight the terrorists" and like that sniper in Saving Private Ryan, who was actually praying to God when he made his kills. From this, I guess Salina should have a very war-like view on religion and especially on the Emperor himself. I'm thinking that their places of worship would be very connected to war and struggle, and there would be images of war, weapons, stuff like that. Do you agree with this, Dinoman? Having lived in the US for almost 20 year now, I must agree that many Americans, including most of our president, belived that the Judeo-Christian god is on our side when we go to war. Of course, they fail the realise that religious justification for war is not only downright hipocritical, it makes them seem just as radical, bigoted, and intolerant as the religious extremist our soldiers are fighting. Bush II is no different than any other past wartime president in using religion. The difference is that Bush II chooses to use the military to push his own agenda first, and defend America second. Of course, you might say that the entire Imperial Cult has a very war-like view, and that all shrines might have a very strong militaristic and destructive theme, but I'm not sure I would agree about that. To me, the Imperial Cult at its purest stresses the purity of Mankind, the position of their saviour, the Emperor, and the darkness that is the alien, the mutant and the heretic. War is an important part, but it's not really the core of the Imperial cult, as I see it. And there are probably a lot of accultured forms of the Imperial cult that have a less destructive theme. The Meksumians are known to be rather peaceful, for example, and I'll probably make some cultures on Archaios to be like that as well. Not pacifistic, but not entirely devoted to bloodshed either. I see the Imperial Cult as very similar to the medievil religions (Christianity and Islam in particular) in that they use a doctrine of fear, hatred, and paranoid rethoric to work citizens into a vengeful frenzy. Humans have always been paranoid about protecting themselves. It is a biological need, instilled in us from our days walking the savahnas of Africa to protect ourselves from lions and other predators. After mankind wiped out all major predators in the world to become the dominant one, we turned to being afraid of each other and warring on each other. Egypt, Greece, Rome, China, India, and even the U.S. all have histories of using state (official or un-official) religion to turn people against others. The Imperium continues the bloody tradition, using the Cult as a tool to wage war against aliens and traitors. I see the Imperial Cult as centered on hatred of others, not warfare. But I digress. Do you agree on this militaristic and destructive theme for a Salinan shrine? Not any-more-so than Altarra or Heleonis. The people of Salinas are not warriors by heart. Most are miners and craftsmen/women, and those who are soldiers join up so that someday they can vote in elections or travel to some distant world. PS: On the map, are you sure it's feasible to have a desert on that continent? I mean, not only is the temperature quite... well, temperate, but this world is so wet, it has so much water, that I don't understand how this land could remain dry. It has the right temperature for vegetation, and I imagine rain showers would be frequent. I suppose it can be upgraded to a prarie region, or even wasteland from centuries of pollution.
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Post by CELS on Jul 14, 2004 4:17:55 GMT -5
I'll carefully dodge a potentially interesting but ultimatelly Off-Topic discussion about american politicians' use of religion Well, what I really need to know is whether or not you consider it plausible for Salinans to portray the Emperor as a great warrior, and for their shrines to have statues of great warriors. Or would this perhaps be better for another world in the Archaios sub, or even the Anargo sector?
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Post by Dazo on Nov 6, 2004 12:42:17 GMT -5
I wouldn't worry about those worlds, at the moment neither world appears to be heading in the direction of being classed as a garden world, in fact Seleca is now a civilised world, and quechit is well, i'm not sure where malika is going with it, so feel free to develop your world the way you want
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