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Post by Minister on Aug 14, 2004 3:37:50 GMT -5
I have no objection. Be awaer, however, that whatever you type is liable to be picked at by everyone here (in the nicest possible way, of course. ;D ).
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Post by KeirLeslie on Aug 28, 2004 22:49:00 GMT -5
This is the history I came up with. I shall soon do the orginisation, but thought I'd show this to you all first so it can be picked to shreds. One ? signifies Sistina the world before it's renaming. Deus Volte means God wills it. Used by Pope Urban II to launch the First Crusade.
History This small Order specialises in researching claims of miracles, saints and other manifestations of the Emperors will, having a reputation for meticulousness and holiness. More than one tout of relics has been shown up and proved to be false by the Sisters of the Celestial Rose. History This Order grew out of the Convent of Sisters based on Dorvastor. When, during the Age of Apostasy, the forces of the Heretic Tratovinis rose up on scores of worlds, taking advantage of the strife and confusion. They desecrated hundreds of shrines, cathedrals and basilicas, and in the most daring raid took the Lance of Atonement from the Shrine of St Cariath on Dorvastor.
After the news of Vandire's death rached Anargo and some semblance of order restored, a Mission was formed, headed by Palatine Beatrice, with the aim of searching out and locating relics taken by Tratovinis.
In order to cover the vast expanses of space the Heretic's forces could have fled to the Mission split up, with Palatine Beatrice taking a scouting force ahead whilst the rest of the Mission followed up behind.
The scouting group consisted of an Immolator, three squads of Battle Sisters and a Seraphim squad. The Mission hunted him across the sectors of Anargo and Cruciatine, then still untroubled by Ork waaghs, searching a hundred worlds for the relic.
Eventually, on the planet then known as ? they ran Tratovinis to ground. Elated the scouting force began to search the planet for his hiding place. Finding it and noting the lack of defensive weapons, Beatrice launched a foolhardy attack. She launched a lightning raid, slamming on to the dry and scorched surface of ?, and tearing through the Traitors hiding place, searching for the Lance of Atonement.
They caught the Heretics like rats in a trap, yet in a horrible twist, the trapped became the trappers, as the Heretics were revealed as Daemonhosts. They ripped through the too-eager scouting force, the Champion at the front wielding the Lance of Atonement, it’s once pure edge now serrated and dripping with the blood of innocents.
In a desperate act of sacrifice Sister Sisitina threw herself upon the blade and purified it with the purity of her faith.
The Mission returned to Dorvastor, awed at the miracle they’d witnessed. However, when the Mission reached Dorvastor the Cardinal denied Sistina Saint status, saying that in the aftermath of the Age of Apostasy the Sisters of Battle were not viewed with favour in much of the Church, being seen as the instrument of oppression.
The Mission was rotated out to man the Rose in the Hall, a space station in the Hall of the Martyr, a relic of the Age of Strife. This station was often used as a meditative retreat, allowing Sisters unsure of their calling to think over their vocation.
Beatrice spent months in the Dome of Petals, heart of the Convent and filled with a thousand devotional texts. She slowly sunk into a deep depression at the injustice done to Sistina, refusing food and drink for the last few weeks of her stay. After several months, she came across an old tome, Lives of the Emperors Saints. Reading the stories of the Saints she was filled with a great anger, as she knew that Sistina had done far more than many who were Saints.
She emerged not long afterwards, where she declared that if the Cardinal wished she would preach at the Ascension Day Feast.
When the time came for her to deliver the sermon Beatrice took the pulpit, and began to speak, shakily at first but with growing strength.
“My children, I stand here to talk to you about the grave injustice wrought upon one of our own. I stand here to talk about a Sister of ours who gave all she had to give to Man’s Divine Emperor, and then more. When the Thrice-Cursed Heretic Tratovinis, may his pain never end, took from this place the Lance of Atonement and defiled it, she hunted him. When, on the Ice-world of Terast in the Cruciatine Sector, he turned the Governor, she fought him. When he attacked us in the void between Terast and ? She defended the pilot, and saved the Navigator, securing our safe passage. And when, finally we arrived on ? she gave her very life to defend me. She gave her life to save my worthless existence. Now, I will tell you about that battle against the Heretic where she died. We plummeted upon that Emperor forsaken planet like bolts out of a clear sky. We fought through the forces of Tratovinis, cutting through them, for we were young and proud in our faith. I led that assault on the Heretic. I was first to reach him and, in my eagerness to remove him from the sight of our Emperor I over reached myself, for lo, when I cleaved his vile body in half a Daemon emerged, wielding the Lance of Atonement, though it was defiled by symbols of the Ruinous Powers, and it glowed with a strange red light. It strode forth and knocked me back, punishing my haste. I lay prone, trapped by the Spear of Cleansing. I ordered the retreat, for it was obvious that we could not carry the day and vanquish the Daemon. Yet even as I made peace with our Divine Lord and the unholy beast stood over me I heard a voice singing the battle hymn of our convent ‘xxx xxxx xxx’. I wondered who had uttered that defiant chant. And then, it was taken up by a chorus of voices. And I marvelled, believing myself gone on. But then I opened my eyes, and saw a Sister standing over me as the Deamon lifted the once holy relic over his abominable head before stabbing it down, piercing Sistina through the heart. And then he pulled, trying to wrench it from her dying body. Yet she resisted, holding on to the spearhead, refusing to allow him to defile it. Suddenly, I heard the chatter of bolter fire as the rest of the Mission took heart from Sistina, for that was her name, and her noble sacrifice and started to pour fire into the monstrosity. Finally I my hand flamer and burned its hands, forcing it to release the Spear. And as it let go it fragmented, dissolving as the force of its hatred met the implacable force of Sistina’s will. She was a shining example of bravery and piety, one we were all proud to count as a Sister. Know, Sisters, that Sistina is unacknowledged, that she will soon be forgotten, whilst fat Cardinals and Confessors are raised above all others. Why? Because she was fooled by a vile Apostate, as so many of you were too. Was not her noble sacrifice enough to expiate her sins? Yet, lo, Preachers and clergymen who preached Vandire's doctrine eagerly must only ask forgivness whilst even in death we are not repentant enough! Is that what our Divine Majesty wished? No! Let us raises our voices against this injustice, let us set our wills against it! Let us raise Sistina to Sainthood! Deus volte!”
At that the Sisters in the hall took up their battle hymn, and it was not long before the entire congregation was singing. At this display of popular support for Sisitina the Cardinal had little choice, and declared her a Saint.
He then announced that the scouts would form the nucleus of a new Convent, with remit to maintain in the minds of men the memories of Saints and Martyrs. The patron was to St. Sistina, and it was to be headed by Beatrice. The Mission took the name of the Celestial Rose after their Convent, gifted to them in exchange for the armour the Mission had used, for they only took five suits and the Immolator Sistina had served in.
When the reforms of Sebastian Thor were enacted, the Convent became an Order, the Order Pronatus of the Celestial Rose of Our Divine Majesty.
The Order grew from its humble beginnings to have missions in many of the surrounding Sectors, providing a challenge, as it was impossible to arm all the Sisters so, the Order was divided into two branches, the Neri and the Bianche.
St Sistina is entombed on the Rose in the Hall, holding in one hand the Lance of Atonement, and in the other the Writ of Sainthood. Beside her lies Canoness Beatrice, holding a copy of her eulogy for Sistina and the emblem of the Order, a red rose on a black field, speckled with silver stars.
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Post by Minister on Aug 30, 2004 12:23:20 GMT -5
Right, time to pick to shreds! ;D Firstly, I would avoid setting in stone the composition of the force. Firstly, because it's not "mythic" sounding to list specifics, second because it makes life easier if we want to attatch other characters onto this concept. Secondly, I would avoid cannonising anyone during the Age of the Apostacy. Have her cannonised afterwards, perhaps during the reformation. Untill that point, she would be hailed as a Hero of the Imperium. Thirdly, the Sororitas did not have power armour during the Reign of Blood. Their armour was a gift from the Mechanicus a few centuries later when the Sisterhood reclaimed an anchient Forge World (well... a gift might be stretching it. Payment would be a more accurate description. ;D ) My nit-pickyness is renowned, so do not take it as an attack on you. All nits must be picked. A very good core scrypt, and a solid foundation for the future of the Celestial Rose.
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Post by CELS on Aug 30, 2004 15:00:13 GMT -5
One ? signifies Sistina the world before it's renaming. Cirrus I Scorched the surface? How? And what's the Lance of Atonement? I'm not too sure about this. Daemonhosts are extremely rare, despite what Inquisitor might lead you to believe. Eisenhorn is one of the very, very few individuals who has succeeded in controlling one. Might it not better to simply have them possessed? Just as effective, but lots easier. This needs to be elaborated. What happened exactly? Did the enemy just vanish into thin air when the lance was destroyed, or did she just accomplish the purification of the corrupted weapon? And you might want to mention that she was actually killed as the lance pierced her heart. It seems rather unlikely that the Cardinal would allow this. He's already a bit put off by them claiming that Sistina was a Saint, I suppose, and not really wanting to give them a chance to shout at him at the Feast. In my opinion, we should not mix 'colour text' like this with ASP background. Following GW's tradition, this would be put in a seperate box, I guess A servant of the Emperor is not worthless The very honour of serving the Emperor makes her existence holy. This would probably kill all the old ladies present at the Feast, send the children crying, and be reason enough for the Inquisition to kill or mind-scrub anyone present during her speech In other words... don't talk about deamns and chaos sigils in front of ordinary people. Now it's starting to sound like she's bragging, and these are really not details that she'd tell the public. None of them probably know what a hand flamer is, or even a flamer. Pretty disrespectful for a Sister. She would probably be killed for this, though I doubt she'd say something like this anyway. It's like a Catholic Cardinal mouthing off about the Pope I believe the Emperor is called Imperator, actually
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Post by KeirLeslie on Aug 31, 2004 2:06:09 GMT -5
Okay, nit-pickers.
Oh yes, I can't quite work out how to use the quotes. Assume that all quotes are of CELS.
To Minister: All points noted. This did not occur during the actual Age of Apostasy, but in the aftermath, when the Imperium were picking up the pieces. As to the point about the force, consider all details gone.
To Cels
The Lance of Atonement is the relic taken by Tratovinis. The surface of Sistina was not scorched by them, but by hellish conditions.
Okay, Daemonhosts become Possesed.
Beatrices offer was seen as a gesture of reconciliation and acceptance. The Cardinal didn't expect her to start insulting trhe Church.
The speech actually happened, and is not mythic, but factual. I think that it should remain in the main body as it isn't in character but out of character.
Hmm. How about: when I cleaved his vile body in half a twisted and vile creature emerged, wielding the Lance of Atonement, though it was defiled by symbols of the blasphmey and hate, and it glowed with a strange red light.
As for the hand flamer how about:
Finally, as the Mission's fire tore through the beast, Sistina fell, her proud and noble heart refusing to release the blade. As she fell she wrested from the beast the Lance of Atonement.
Not really. This is meant to be a retrospective comment, aimed at the corruption of Vandire and his cronies. Besides, Martin Luther said a lot worse about the Pope, and he still in theroy supported the Catholic Church when he said it.
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Post by Destecado on Sept 10, 2004 10:12:43 GMT -5
This is the history I came up with. I shall soon do the orginisation, but thought I'd show this to you all first so it can be picked to shreds. One ? signifies Sistina the world before it's renaming. Deus Volte means God wills it. Used by Pope Urban II to launch the First Crusade. HistoryThis small Order specialises in researching claims of miracles, saints and other manifestations of the Emperors will, having a reputation for meticulousness and holiness. More than one tout of relics has been shown up and proved to be false by the Sisters of the Celestial Rose. History This Order grew out of the Convent of Sisters based on Dorvastor. When, during the Age of Apostasy, the forces of the Heretic Tratovinis rose up on scores of worlds, taking advantage of the strife and confusion. They desecrated hundreds of shrines, cathedrals and basilicas, and in the most daring raid took the Lance of Atonement from the Shrine of St Cariath on Dorvastor. After the news of Vandire's death rached Anargo and some semblance of order restored, a Mission was formed, headed by Palatine Beatrice, with the aim of searching out and locating relics taken by Tratovinis. The time table for this story needs to occur later than the Age of Apostasy or at least some time after the death of Vandire. Though the Age of Apostasy did not truly end with his death, the Adeptus Sororitas did not come into existence till after Vandire was out of the picture. They were originally know as the Daughters of the Emperor and served as Vandire’s personal body guard. You may want to place the Adeptus Sororita’s arrival in the Anargo Sector near the waining years of the Age of Apostasy or soon after the passification of the the Sector. The state of the Anargo Sector and the factions that existed in it during the Age of Apostasy is still in question. Several concepts have been put forward for a war between forces loyal to Vandire and those that opposed him. Other ideas have been put forward that point to the Alpha Legion and the cults that they sponsor some how having a hand in the turmoil occurring during the Age of Apostasy. We also need to consider the moving of the Sector capital from the Sargassos subsector during this time. It may also help if you explained who Tratovinis is. Was he perhaps the head of the forces loyal to Vandire or maybe a minor official corrupted by the ruinous powers or was he some sort of arch heretic or traitor space marine? She launched a lightning raid, slamming on to the dry and scorched surface of ?, and tearing through the Traitors hiding place, searching for the Lance of Atonement. They caught the Heretics like rats in a trap, yet in a horrible twist, the trapped became the trappers, as the Heretics were revealed as Daemonhosts. They ripped through the too-eager scouting force, the Champion at the front wielding the Lance of Atonement, it’s once pure edge now serrated and dripping with the blood of innocents. A line or two explaining what the Lance of Atonement is or who it belonged to my help explain why the sisters had gone through such great pains in order to recover it. The lance also needs to have something to make it stand out from just a regular lance. The word Expiatus might be carved into the center of the blade. Expiatus, from which we derive expiate (to put an end to, to extinguish the guilt incurred by). The lance may have had its origins in the Age of Apostasy. Perhaps it was wielded by some unknown saint (or they could be named) whose loyalty to the Emperor and the “true” imperial cult never wavered. He preached long and hard of the heresy of Vandire and strove to stamp it out like any other heresy. I’m still trying to think of what powers the lance might posses, but it really isn’t important for this discussion. He may have taken the road that lead Sebastian Thor to rail against Vandire and eventually aid in his downfall, but he was killed most vially by chaos cultists who made it look as if followers of Vandire did it. The lance was lost until it again arose in the hands of a chaos champion. The Adeptus Sororita forces you have listed also seem insufficient to undertake such a mission. . Rather than hunting a particular individual, what if they were following up rumors and were more on a scouting mission looking for information about the lance and other relics. Perhaps someone became suspicious by their questions and alerted the cultists, who laid the trap for the sisters. Daemonhosts are also way too powerful for the forces you have being on planet. One possessed (Alpha Legion) marine backed up by a host of cultists would do the trick just as well. This might help to explain why such a new sister such as Systina was there. She would have not been battle hardened yet, so this could have been seen as a seasoning mission. It was possible that they could run into conflict, but it was not all out war. Such missions might serve as a kind of “field test” for younger sisters. In a desperate act of sacrifice Sister Sisitina threw herself upon the blade and purified it with the purity of her faith. More than one line needs to be dedicated to how the lance became purified. More than just explaining the purification of the lance it also explains why Sistina should be made a saint. I still stand by the account of how it happened I originally posted on this thread. The blade burned with a sickly red flame. Its cut a swath through the sisters. In desperation Sistina prayed to the Emperor for strength and threw herself upon the blade. The blade pierce through her and exited her back, but became lodged. Try as he might, the chaos champion was able to wrest the blade from within her.
The flames of the blade cause the ceremite plates of her armour to curl up and blacken as so much paper. Her close cropped hair and skin were also set ablaze, yet no sound was heard from Sistina. Many beleive that she was already dead by this time, but those sisters near the battle state that she still struggled with the spawn of chaos to keep the blade lodged within her.
Her sisters were not lax. They used Sistina's sacrifice to cut down the champion. Even after the champion fell the battle continued as they sisters slew the remainder of the cult members present. It was only afterwards that they turned their attention to their own fallen, among them Sistina.
The heat and flames from the blade had been intense. Little but charged remains were left, but a miraculace thing had occured. The blade no longer burned with the corruption of chaos. On closer inspection not a trace of chaos could be found upon it. It has pierced Sistina through the heart.
Some beleive that it was her courage, faith and unwillingness to relinquish the sword back to chaos that had purified it. Her sisters believe it was the purity and love of the emperor in her heart which qunched the taint of chaos.[/i] Granted, the above needs to be edited, but it paints a more thorough picture of the event. It also show that humanity of Sistina. During the battle she experienced doubt. She saw her sisters falling around her, and saw her own death pressing in around her. Perhaps the doubt was pushed away by her prayer to the emperor or maybe he sent her a vision of how to save her remaining sisters. It could also be explained away by the fact of an inexperienced warrior taking a completely unexpected action. Who willingly throws themselves on the enemy’s weapon?
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Post by Destecado on Sept 10, 2004 10:33:03 GMT -5
The Mission returned to Dorvastor, awed at the miracle they’d witnessed. However, when the Mission reached Dorvastor the Cardinal denied Sistina Saint status, saying that in the aftermath of the Age of Apostasy the Sisters of Battle were not viewed with favour in much of the Church, being seen as the instrument of oppression. I don't think that this should be given as the public reason. While it is true that the Sisters of Battle were once the Daughter's of the Emperor and vandires personal guard, they were ultimately responsible for his death, which helped to bring an end to the Age of Apostasy. The Adeptus Sororitas was also not the visible face of the forces of vandire. The Frateris Templar was the militant arm of Vandire's forces. It could be that the Cardinal personally harbored ill feelings towards the sisterhood and that is the reason why he would not have Sistina elevated to Sainthood. Maybe he had "experts" look over the Lance and they found no trace of tain, but concluded the no trace of taint had existed on the weapon. The red glow was attributted to some power used by the possessed marine and not any taint on the weapon itself (just as a possibility). The general public would not know any better. It could also be spun that while a minion of chaos held a weapon of the Imperium in its ruinous grasp and weilded it, the weapon itself remained untainted. It would inspire peope to find the same faith in the Emperor within themselves to resist the blight of chaos that still threatened the Sector in the aftermath of the Age of Apostsy. Sistina's sainthood was sacrificed to ecclisastic dogma. I also don't think that you should have Beatrice denounce the Cardinal or rail against him while preaching. From the way you described his feelings toward the Sisterhood, he would probably be lloking for an excuse to have them all burned as traitors or at least thrown out of the Sector. What if the planet that Cirrus I, which would eventually come to be known as Sistina are the ones that eventually pushed for her connonization or perhaps in a little part of heresy declared her a saint after the star that the planet circled began to go through its current flare phase. The possesed marine that she had helped to kill may have been terrorizing the planet along with the cults that he had under his control. The arrival of the sisters had seen the end or at least a path towards the end of their oppression of the people. Although the church could not hold a feast day for her, because she was not cannonized, the governor could declare a planetary holiday on the day of her martyrdom. It may help if the small group of sisters that had come to the planet on the scouting mission had been supported by local forces. this would provide others who had witnessed the miricale first hand and could attest to the story of her martyrdom. The church of Cirrus I if not in name, at least in reverence viewed her as a saint. Perhaps since they were unable to call her Saint Sistina, they simply refered to her as the Sister of the Flame. Any thoughts on when the name of the planet would have been changed to Sistina. I was thinking that it may have happened some centuries later. Perhaps with the appointment of a new cardinal, the church finally relented and cannonized Sistina. part of the recognition was to rename the planet of her martyrdom.
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Post by KeirLeslie on Sept 12, 2004 23:32:12 GMT -5
How about the Cardinal announcing that, if proof was providewd he would declare her a Saint, thinking that if he rejected everything they said as biased they'd give up. Instead they worked long and hard, interviewing eyewitnesses and the like until he had no option? This would give them a reputation for searching out and finding the truth, along with establishing a close relationshipo with the people of Cirrus I.
The Lance. I was thinking of this being the Lance of St Cariath, who I believe Minister was working on as being patron Saint of the Sub-sector. The theft would occur during the confusin, the Mision formed later, when order was restored.
Btw, my internet connection is running as low as 20 bytes a second at times, so I may not be able to post for a week, until the school holidays. Then I shall be able to do some serious work on the Sisters. Thank you for your patience.
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